The Expendables 3 (2014) Directed by Patrick Hughes. Starring: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li. IMDB says: “Barney augments his team with new blood for a personal battle: to take down Conrad Stonebanks, the Expendables co-founder and notorious arms trader who is hell bent on wiping out Barney and every single one of his associates.”
The Expendables franchise is not known for producing cinematic masterpieces or artistic works, it’s known for making films that are fun to watch. And to that end, The Expendables 3 is more than serviceable.
The gang reunites for another contract to take out an illegal arms trafficker portrayed by Mel Gibson. Sylvester Stallone leads the crew and many familiar faces make a return. The film is full of exciting action sequences. There are more than enough bullets, explosions, and gratuitous violence to go around. And that is really where this film shines, it’s a no-holds barred action fest meant to delight the sort of folks who get excited when they see all of yesteryears action stars in the same film.
Going into this film you have to lower your expectations for good movie-making. Even with lowering my cinematic standards, I still found portions of this film difficult to watch. Even some of the most basic lines found their way out of the star’s mouths in a way that makes you want to punch them in the jaw, for real. The line delivery feels forced, especially when the characters deliver a one-liner or an emotional side story. The acting, surprised to say, is probably the biggest low point of the film.
The plot is not overly complex and is in many ways predictable. I didn’t see this as hindering the film, however. When watching a film such as this, the plot exists only to allow the action to occur. Maybe it’s best to think of Expendables 3 as a sort of pornographic film, you know, the kind that come on HBO late at night. There’s acting, sure; and a plot to connect the scenes together. At the end of the day, though; do you really care about any of that? Did the writers/directors/producers? And most of all, does it even matter?
The whole film is geared towards putting these stars in a position to battle folks using whatever weapons they can get their hands on. And at that, it excels. One particular high point for me was Antonio Banderas’ character. He is introduced a little before the midpoint of the film but he shines above all others in a stand-out role. Banderas is the comic-relief, which may surprise some, but he pulls it off well. I found myself chuckling a few times at his on-screen antics and they juxtapose well with the violence and action happening around him. Obviously, you won’t be watching this for him alone, but he makes a dull, brutal bash-fest lively and fun.
In close, if you have seen Expendables 1 or 2, or RED, or any other action film in general, you should have a good idea what to expect. If you enjoy seeing people beat on each other for really no reason at all, this is the picture for you. If you have been silently thinking to yourself, “I wish Stallone, Schwarzenegger, Statham, Banderas, Li, Snipes, Harrison Ford, and Dolph Lundgren would get together and do some stuff” stop what you’re doing right now and go see it. By the way, a slight aside, did you know Dolph Lundgren (aka Ivan Drago) has Master’s Degree in Chemistry and had a full-ride Fullbright Scholarship to MIT. Seriously. For most folks though, this film is one that can easily be passed. It is definitely something I can see myself putting on the television if I simply want to turn off my brain and be entertained for an hour or so. And at its core, that’s what The Expendables is all about, mindless entertainment.
OVERALL SCORE: 54%