Rocky was an awesome movie. A nobody from south Philly has a shot at the title. He comes from nothing, goes the distance, and gives us all inspiration and hope that we too can be somebody. You know what would make this movie even better? If Mark Wahlberg were starring.
In the first installment of a monthly series, we’re going to take a look at why Rocky would be a better movie with Mark Wahlberg instead of that Sylvester Stallone guy. You might be thinking, “Hey man, Rocky is a classic, what could this Marky Mark possibly add?” well, I see where you’re coming from, but trust me, it would be better.
For starters, when you think of a tough guy from the rough part of town, you think Mark Wahlberg. He’s in better shape now than Sly was, even in his prime. Plus, he’s a natural fighter. Did you know he was convicted of attempted murder after beating up two random Vietnamese men? Now if that doesn’t just scream troubled youngster from South Philly, I don’t know what does. He’s reportedly been arrested 20-25 times for various fights and was addicted to cocaine by age 13. Your main character needs to have had a tough upbringing and be down on his luck? Who better than Mark Wahlberg.
Picture this, a young Mark Wahlberg, down on his luck. Getting into some random fights trying to make a few bucks the old fashioned way. He’s approached by a boxing promoter, he’s being given a shot at a pro. Cut to Marky Mark, shirtless, all oiled up and ready for action. He’s got a few tats so you know he’s a bad ass. All of his dialogue has that “F you man, I don’t even care” vibe that Mark does so well. He doesn’t need help from anybody, because he’s never had it before. An old man befriends him causing him to resist and push the old man away. But back that old man comes and then Mark is forced to break down in a rare showing of emotion because he knows he’s out of shape and over the hill. He knows he needs this man’s help. And after accepting, the wise old man pushes him further than he ever thought possible. As the night nears, Mr. Wahlberg is forced to reflect on his humble beginnings and takes a moment of quiet solemn mentally ready himself for the biggest moment of his life. As he arrives at the ring, the crowd ridicules him rather than celebrating him for being a local hero. Mark doesn’t care, nothing fazes him. He’s ready for this and begins the fight. He lands a couple of blows early on but he’s clearly outmatched. He loses the fight but he goes the distance. He makes it to the final round and loses in a unanimous decision. Mark still doesn’t care. In his mind, he made it; he’s the best.